Chapter 7: Why are boobs good?

I've been on this diet for the past few weeks. I've got to lose weight in the hip/butt area of my body to be able to fit into my gorgeous wedding dress that I bought at an awesome price (part of the deal was that they discontinued the dress and they only had the one size left). I measured myself four weeks ago and the measurements were as follows:

Bust: 42
Waist: 38
Hips: 44.
Butt: 46

The measurements for the dress are

Bust: 40 or 41 (can't remember)
Waist: 36
Hips/Butt: 40 or 41 (can't remember)

Currently I am here:

Bust: 41
Waist: 36
Fattest Part of My Belly Around my belly button: 41.5
Hips:41
Butt: 42.5

That means I've lost an inch in my boobs. Sadness. But joy because my Butt has dropped down to a voluminous 42.5 instead of a bouncy 46. I looked hot today. Hatcha. ;)

Aside from being sexy, I am also sad. Today was a rough. I've been without carbohydrates for quite some time and I took a binge day at the local buffet. Apparently, in the middle of nowhere, there are only 6 to 8 local restaurants to chose from outside the strip from the mile of fast food places starting at Arby's and ending at Taco Bell. The buffet was called "Ryan's." Now, does an actual Ryan own it? I can't say for sure. What I can tell you is that the mac 'n cheese was surprisingly delicious. I had two plates of it, and a load of ice cream.

I've been waiting to hear back about this job that I applied for. If I got it, then I would feel total fulfillment in life...yes, it's that sort of a career job. However, if I don't get it...then epic fail (I hate that term and I have no idea why I use it so often). If that were to happen, if I didn't get the job, I would probably binge out on Culver's (located conveniently in between the McDonald's and the KFC) and gain that inch back in Harry and Sally before you could count to 5. Let's just pray it doesn't come to that.

Alan has been working like crazy. I haven't seen him at all this week and I miss him so much. He's been working on that bridge like his life depends on it. I guess it does because that's our income, so who can blame him? (Side note: I'm thinking of naming the bridge. Any suggestions?) Today he woke up at 4:30am and left at 5am. He didn't get home until 7pm. By that time, I was craving comfort food so badly from the stress of both not seeing him, the fact that I was already hungry, and that I hadn't heard back from the photo company yet about the job. Carbohydrates were in my future and I could just sense the forces of nature telling me to eat them...EAT THEM.

Do you think I'm weird Strool Pieta? Is it weird for a 21 year old to be engaged and hungry all the time? I feel so out of place in the world. I guess that's not a new feeling. I have never known anyone who has looked like me or acted like me really. I guess Alan gets pretty crazy, so he acts sort of like me, but he doesn't need the same things I do. For instance, I really need to be around people. I'm not sure if he needs that as much as me. Most importantly, I need to be around him. I don't know if he knows that either. I guess I need to talk to him.

There is a possibility that I may be coming home for Halloween. I hope it happens. I miss everyone and everything about Illinois.

Good night strool pieta. Get some rest and I'll hug you in the morning.
hilary hope